Impact is officially on AXS TV. All those who thought Impact was dead and buried will now be able to see how alive the show is, and has always been. Welcome to the FrenchNygma Club, a place for everyone who loves unapologetic and fierce wrestling. For 2 years and a half, I have never tried to convince, I just stated what was real. As we’re moving forward, I will probably be the only one who will not, as I will stand here, fiercely decided to tell the tales of a human, incredible and strong promotion. Feel free to join the Club… Like them, we are Hard To Kill…
On the menu of Impact this week, from Windsor, Ontario, Canada, Naomichi Marufuji will face off one half of the Tag Team Champions, Josh Alexander. Eddie Edwards will square off with X-Division Champion Ace Austin again, but in a Street Fight. Brian Cage will put the Impact World Tag Team Championship on the line in a rematch of Bound For Glory in a cage against Sami Callihan. We’ll also hear from Ken Shamrock and Rob Van Dam. So no more words, let’s get ready for some action, but your French Enygma Steph way, of course…
The Nygma’s Chart of the Week
- Josh Mathews and Don Callis introduced us to Impact Wrestling in the AXS era. Brand-new opening hype video, with a red-coloured design.
- Naomichi Marufuji defeated Josh Alexander.
- oVe arrived but security showed up and told Sami Callihan his brothers were banned from the building. Sami said goodbye to the group, he will be going into the steel cage match alone.
- In The Rascalz Tree House, Wentz and Dez were chilling out. Trey arrived, Fallah Bahh joined them. He was saying Bahh a lot in a depressed manner. So they tried cheering him up by smoking the place up. Fallah was suddenly sporting glasses and talking like a regular human being. He was upset with himself for not having TJP’s back. Wentz told him not to be lost in the sauce, he needed to go out there and believe in himself. They told him to go kick Michael Elgin’s ass, which motivated him.
- Rosemary, Jordynne Grace & Alexia Nicole defeated Impact Knockouts Champion Taya Valkyrie, Madison Rayne & Kiera Hogan.
- Rob Van Dam was chilling in a pool with his girlfriend Katie Forbes. Where did he get his move set from? His own head. Where did the guys of this generation get their moves from? You guessed it, Rob Van Dam. Without him, there would be no Kenny Omega, no Daniel Bryan, no Young Bucks, as everyone’s stealing his moves. RVD carried ECW as he’s one a kind, and he only turned on Rhino because he doesn’t care and is tired of hearing him talk.
- Willie Mack & Rich Swann defeated The Desi Hit Squad (Rohit Raju & Raj Singh w/ Gama Singh).
- Rhino stormed into the building and interrogated Jimmy Jacobs for information on Rob Van Dam. Jacobs told him RVD’s on vacation, so Rhino tells his former friend that he’s getting a GORE! GORE! GORE! at Turning Point (Impact Plus November iPPV).
- Moose welcomed us to Impact Wrestling on AXS TV. He told us how much of a legend he is, and how he proved he’s the best MMA fighter of all time when he beat Ken Shamrock at Bound For Glory. Now he was going to show us he’s the best golfer of all time, as he’s about to hit a hole in one.
- Ken Shamrock was in the ring and told us how he felt about his match at Bound For Glory. He was sure he was going to win, and it hurt when he couldn’t achieve what he set out to do. Ken had to do a lot of soul-searching to figure out what’s next. He’s come to the conclusion that… Joey Ryan’s entrance interrupted. Joey said that Ken knows he’s got one last mountain to climb. Shamrock didn’t know who he is, so Ryan reminded us he’s the guy who makes wrestling fun again. Ken laughed after remembering Joey is the ‘penis guy’.
Shamrock reminded him he’s a real fighter and Joey’s just a gimmick. Ryan said that was a little stiff, but if he’s just a gimmick, why was he so afraid to touch it? Ken assured him he wasn’t about to announce his retirement, he was planning on sending a message to the locker room, he’s here to work and is ready to take on all challengers. So Joey Ryan made it official for next week, we will see The Most Dangerous Man vs. The Most Dangerous Manhood. Shamrock accepted by shaking his hand, but Joey leaned his groin towards him and Ken quickly knocked him over.
- X-Division Champion Ace Austin defeated Eddie Edwards in a Street Fight Match. Reno Scum interfered on Ace’s behalf, but Eddie took them both out.
- “Suzie” made her debut. The Deaners seemed terrified to see her there without all the makeup. There seemed to be some memory loss, as Suzie didn’t know what happened to Su Yung.
- Johnny Swinger was seeing tons of potential in Alisha Edwards until Ace popped in and told him to go away. Austin reminded her of the promise if he were to win the X Division title. Alisha agreed to meet him next week just for dinner.
- Sami Callihan defeated Brian Cage in a Steel Cage match to become the new Impact World Champion. As Callihan was handed the title and celebrating, Tessa Blanchard entered the ring. Callihan grabbed his baseball bat, there was a staredown, and he smiled while holding the World Championship high above her head.
The Nygma’s Nutcracker(s) of the Week
– Naomichi Marufuji vs Josh Alexander w/ Ethan Page
They locked up, working to the ropes and Marufuji followed with a flurry of kicks, they worked into counters and ended in a standoff. They traded near falls, and Josh followed with chops. Marufuji fired back and Josh followed with strikes. He avoided the dropkick and hit a knee strike. Josh followed with strikes and a clothesline but Marufuji countered back into a dropkick. He followed with chops, an elbow, and then a running double stomp and a hook kick.
Marufuji followed with kicks, Josh fired back and hit the Finlay roll and a flying knee drop off the ropes. Josh follows with a backbreaker. He stomped away at Marufuji, Marufuji followed with kicks and a corner dropkick. They traded, Marufuji laid in chops and Josh fired back but ate hook kicks. The wraparound kick connected. Marufuji countered the Tiger Driver and unloaded kicks. Marufuji kicked at the knee and hit the Sliced Bread #2 for the win.
– XXX-Division Champion Ace Austin vs Eddie Edwards – Street Fight
They brawled at the bell and Edwards followed with a suicide dive. Ace fought back, but Edwards hit a suplex on the ramp. Ace cut him off with baton shots, trashcan shots and strikes. Edwards cut him off, slamming him off of the apron. He followed with trashcan lid shots, but Ace fired back and followed with a superkick. He tossed a trashcan in the ring, choked out Edwards and kicked him in the face. He brought out a table, a chair, but Edwards cut him off with lid shots. Eddie brought the table in, Ace cut him off with a lid shot, set the table up in the corner, and Edwards hit a superkick. Reno Sum arrived and attacked Edwards. Edwards tossed Adam through a table, but Ace hit a neck breaker onto a trashcan.
Post break, Ace hit a suplex and an enzuigiri. He set up a chair, followed Edwards up top and Edwards slid out and crotched Ace. He followed with chair shots. The avalanche belly to back suplex connected. Edwards went to the floor and got Kenny. Ace cut him off with a belt shot. Ace grabbed Kenny and nailed Edwards. He broke Kenny, but Edwards countered the Fold with the trashcan, trapping Ace. He followed with chair shots, Ace got trapped in the can. Edwards grabbed another table, set it up and took Ace up top. Ace strangled the eyes and loaded up the forearm pad. Edwards fought back, but Ace nailed him and hits the Fold off the ropes through the table for the win.
– Impact World Championship Cage Match – Brian Cage (c) vs Sami Callihan
They started brawling on the floor with Cage controlling. He lawn darted Sami to the cage, but Sami cut him off and they headed in the cage. Sami locked himself in so Cage climbed in and followed with clotheslines. He whipped Sami to the cage but Sami cut him off and nailed him with the bat. Cage was busted open and Sami continued to attack. Sami bit him and strangled the eyes. He stomped away at Cage, hit another bat shot and followed with strikes but Cage fired up. Sami followed with a spear into the cage. Post break, both men were down.
Cage fought to his feet and Sami followed with strikes. Superkick by Cage, they traded and unloaded one each other. Sami scored with a lariat, then another. The Cactus Special followed. Cage followed with a powerbomb, a buckle bomb and Sami then cradled him. He followed with a flurry of kicks, the Cactus Special and rolled into a third, and then a fourth but Cage kicked out. Cage countered back with an Alabama Slam and a rolling lariat. Cage headed up top and Sami cut him off. He followed him up and they traded, Cage hits headbutts but Sami hit a Cactus Special off the ropes for the win.
The not-Nygma’s Moment(s) of the Week
Rob Van Dam invented wrestling… What do I add?
The Lollipop and Baby-Oil Nygmalicious Moment of The Week
Joey Ryan, the anti-MC Hammer… With him, you can touch this… I was appaled to state the same people who were enjoying Scarlett Bordeaux doing a striptease to Scott Steiner were the ones who were bashing Joey Ryan for his attitude. Take him as he is, guys. His character is not that far from “Ravishing” Rick Rude one in the 1980s… Wrestling has always been a world of characters. I had the chance to talk to him a while ago when his documentary was played for the first time in the USA, and I agree with him on this, detractors create attention. Love him or hate him, I will stay Nygmalicious on that…
The Nygma’s Award of the Week
– Rich Swann & Willie Mack
What a terrific team Swann and Mack are… After their performance at Bound For Glory, it became clear in everyone’s mind they were the new #1 contenders for the Impact World Tag Team Champions. Ok, let’s give to The North what belongs to Ethan Page and Josh Alexander, they are strong Champions. They have better take care of Swann and Mack because they won’t miss another chance to strip them off of their titles.
– Suzie/ Su Yung
Last time we saw Su Yung on TV, she was left dead by Havok and resurrected on a hospital table. More than a month later, the question was still on hold: would Su come back of the Undead Realm the same, or not? She is definitely not the same, for the moment. Here comes Suzie, in her white dress and wearing no make-up. Does she have revenge in mind? Has she changed? We’ll find out soon enough…
– Jordynne Grace
It was a 6-Woman match situation but Jordynne Grace pinned Taya Valkyrie for the win. And it means a lot. As of today, Jordynne and Rosemary are probably the more logic contenders for the Knockouts title. Even if they had already feuded with Taya Valkyrie in the past, they are the Knockouts Taya should really be afraid of.
When you hurt a beast, whether it is submissive or aggressive. What was Rob Van Dam expecting when he kicked Rhino in the face at Bound For Glory? A thank-you and goodbye? Of course, Rhino wants to destroy RVD. So get our of the pool, guy, because Gore time is coming soon…
– Tessa Blanchard
In my Bound For Glory review, I was not very happy with what the company did of Blanchard and Callihan momentum. Two weeks later, you can forget those words because the momentum has never disappeared. Sami Callihan was given maybe a minute to celebrate before Tessa Blanchard walked her way to the ring and clearly showed Callihan she wanted the fight and the Championship. May a female wrestler hold the Impact World Championship belt? Here is a question we will talk about a lot in the next few weeks… let’s say until Hard To Kill...
– Sami Callihan
I was expecting it. If it wasn’t meant to happen at Bound For Glory, Impact Wrestling would make the title change happen at Impact on AXS premiere. Like Don Callis stated, he gave it all to Impact Wrestling and in this ring this week. He won that belt without cheating or the help of his good brothers. Which makes him an even more legit Champion. When I talked to him, like 3 weeks ago, becoming World Champion was very important to him. He’s been with Impact Wrestling for 2 years and has given the company his heart, his soul and his blood. What a great reward of his he received…
To be eNYGMAtic…
Read those words carefully, this is one of the best episodes of Impact I’ve ever watched and reviewed in 2 years and a half. The recipe, made of action, promos and the cinematic orchestra, was there and worked. The show was a real Fallout from Bound For Glory, with strong storylines being built up. And the 4 Aces I told you about, they were there too. Young talents, power to women, gutsy matches, and strong characters. For the first time in years, but I may be wrong, Impact was trending on Twitter when aired in the USA… The AXS deal has given the show some wings to fly higher than ever.
So, I will ask the question again, who said Impact was dead? Who said Impact was a shitty show? To all these people who seem to be stuck in 2013 or even before, watch now. Move forward, enjoy the ride and the flavour of revolution. Like I said earlier, move forward when I will stand by the words I’ve said again and again over the last 2 years and a half. Impact is, has always been, and will always be the show to watch, the wrestling to enjoy, the wrestlers to look up to. This is MY Impact.
On this “Nygma Club is in The House” note, until next week, never EVER forget to stay #eNYGMAtic…
All pics, videos, and screenshots courtesy of Impact Wrestling and AXS TV. Photomontage custom made by @frenchnygma exclusively for @steelchairmag @vulturehoundmag.