Roman Reigns is threatening to show up on RAW tonight, despite being told he’s not allowed, or maybe because he’s not allowed. All he’s said is unfinished business, so we’ll have to wait and see what that means. Seth Rollins will be addressing his contract signing with AJ Styles last week. The Revival will respond to their humiliation at the hands of the Usos and defeat to Zack Ryder & Curt Hawkins. Rey Mysterio wants Samoa Joe’s United States Championship. And we can expect interaction between the Money in the Bank matches competitors, and more from Becky Lynch and Lacey Evans.
I’m Amanda and this is the RAW review.
Baron Corbin & Bobby Lashley def. Seth Rollins & AJ Styles
Lucha House Party def. Local Competitors
Ricochet def. Robert Roode
Lacey Evans def. Allie Catrina
The Viking Raiders def. Zack Ryder & Curt Hawkins
Roman Reigns def. Drew McIntyre
Kofi Kingston def. Daniel Bryan
The Key Bits
» Vince McMahon opened the show by telling us that this would be a RAW for the ages, one that no one will ever forget. That was as far as he got before Roman Reigns turned up.
The first thing McMahon said to him was that he had the police out back in case Reigns Superman punched him again. Then he told him off for coming back to RAW as a SmackDown Live superstar.
Reigns told him to watch his tone and called the McMahon family out for saying the WWE Universe was the authority now then still running things themselves. He doesn’t take his orders from the McMahon family anymore, he takes them from the WWE Universe now. He threatened to show up every Monday if people keep making so much noise.
Vince McMahon said that would open the floodgates and cause anarchy. To prove his point, Daniel Bryan turned up next. When Vince McMahon asked him what he was doing there, he said he’d spent the last month in solitude and meditation after the travesty that occurred at WrestleMania. So when he heard Roman was showing up on RAW, he saw an opportunity to have a conversation with Vince.
Kofi Kingston appeared before Vince McMahon could reply. Had the RAW roster taken the night off? Kingston was there to talk to Daniel Bryan. He said Bryan should have come directly to him if he had a problem with the way WrestleMania went down.
Bryan called him an undeserving Champion and said he should never have been given an opportunity. He called him a pancake throwing novelty act and called his win ‘a fluke’.
Vince McMahon interrupted to turn the invasion into his new idea, The Wildcard Rule, where three members of one brand could be invited to visit the other brand for the night. He declared himself a genius.
Kingston said he turned up because he saw Reigns’ tweets and wasn’t doing anything, so he thought he’d join the fun. Daniel Bryan was there to secure his rematch.
Drew McIntyre arrived and said it was up to him to sort this mess out. He was there to deal with the ‘egomaniac’ Roman Reigns and accused him of getting transferred to SmackDown Live to duck him.
Reigns said it didn’t work out for McIntyre at WrestleMania, but maybe he could try again tonight.
Vince McMahon made two WrestleMania rematches as if he’d just thought of them. He gave McIntyre and Reigns their match then made it Kofi Kingston vs Daniel Bryan for the WWE Championship.
Just when we thought we were done, AJ Styles came out, and we went for a break. Styles asked Vince McMahon what he was doing. He finally gets to RAW and now SmackDown Live’s superstars are over here. McMahon told him that it was the new wildcard rule he came up with. Styles said it was very convenient that now he has a chance at the Universal Championship, all of a sudden Seth Rollins’ best friend is back on RAW.
Rollins stormed down to the ring and yelled at Styles for sucker-punching him. He told him that SmackDown Live has been around for over a thousand episodes was fine before Styles got there and it’s fine now he’s left. And this isn’t SmackDown Live, it’s Monday Night Rollins.
Styles said he tried to be a good sport and shake his hand, but Rollins put the title in his face. He tried to walk away, and Rollins kept running his mouth. He didn’t just put him through a table last week he gave him the Phenomenal Forearm. At Money in the Bank, the only difference will be that after he gives him the Phenomenal Forearm, he’ll be standing over him as Universal Champion.
Vince McMahon said it was obvious they wanted to compete, and Rollins and Style were ready to throw down and get into it. McMahon said no, not one on one, they’d be teaming. They argued, but to no avail.
Nothing about this segment made sense. Don’t try to unpick it, just nod your head and move on.
Seth Rollins & AJ Styles vs Baron Corbin & Bobby Lashley was the match no one needed to see but everyone knew we were going to get. Rollins took the majority of the punishment early on, as he generally does, while Styles watching from the apron. It looked like Styles was coming in to save the day, until he got speared off the apron by Lashley. After Corbin had tagged in, Lashley made Rollins unavailable for the tag by pulling him off the apron and slamming him into the barricade. Of course, Rollins got back into it and was ready to Stomp Corbin when the mix-up occurred. Corbin stumbled into styles and took a forearm from him. He staggered back into Rollins and knocked him off balance. Styles came off the ropes with a Phenomenal Forearm, but Corbin moved and he caught Rollins with it. Instead of making amends, AJ Styles just got out of the ring and left. Rollins stared after him for a moment and turned back to Corbin just in time to take End of Days and get pinned.
Later, in a backstage promo, Seth Rollins said it doesn’t matter whether the forearm was an accident. Styles made his point when he walked away after hitting him in the mouth for the second straight week. Next time he walks away from Rollins it will be with two black eyes and a broken face.
» Roman Reigns vs Drew McIntyre – WrestleMania rematch – was a good match. It might have been better than good if we hadn’t seen quite so many matches featuring these two recently. It got increasingly brutal as the match progressed, at one point McIntyre flipped Reigns over his head, sending him face-first into the apron. We went to a break after that and Reigns was up and about and going for a Superman punch when we came back. He got slammed into the canvas instead and McIntyre readied himself for the Claymore. His missed with the Claymore, but connected with a headbutt and got a two count. Drew McIntyre was ready when Reigns went for a drive-by, kicked him in the stomach, and threw him into the steps. He still couldn’t get the pin. In desperation, McIntyre went to the top and got caught with a Superman punch on his way down. The pin attempt was unsuccessful, but Reigns delivered the spear and might have got the pin if he hadn’t been jumped on by Shane McMahon.
Shane was with Elias and they started to beat on Roman Reigns. The Miz ran down and chased Shane McMahon away. Elias held Reigns up so Drew McIntyre could deliver the Claymore.
Backstage, Miz was still chasing Shane McMahon. Shane hid, then had to run away from Charly Caruso trying to interview him. The Miz caught up with McMahon at his car and beat on him with a chair. Shane McMahon landed a low blow to get away.
» Daniel Bryan is very concerned about Kofi Kingston’s environmental impact, apparently. Whatever motivation gets him through the day.
Kofi Kingston said a lot of people have said he shouldn’t be Champion and he’s shown them all. He’ll do the same for Bryan.
Kofi Kingston vs Daniel Bryan – WWE Championship match – was the main event of the evening. Yep. Somehow, the defence of SmackDown Live’s primary Championship was the main event of RAW. Kofi Kingston took a nasty fall when Daniel Bryan pitched him over the top rope but he recovered quickly and sprang up to the top turnbuckle when Bryan threw him towards the steps, then launched himself off to take Bryan down. Kingston was struggling though, more so when he was forced to crawl for the ropes to break a submission. Daniel Bryan met Trouble in Paradise with a kick of his own, and dodged Kingston’s second attempt. On the third attempt, Kofi Kingston connected and retained the WWE Championship.
The Other Stuff
» Sami Zayn came out to give the WWE Universe another bitter lecture about what’s wrong with us all. Only, this time, Braun Strowman appeared to shut him up. As Strowman got to the ring, Zayn dropped the mic and started to take his jacket off, then rolled out of the ring and hopped the barricade. Braun Strowman hopped over an cut him off then chased him out of the arena.
Strowman cornered him backstage, Zayn threw stuff at him and tried to escape under a shutter but Strowman grabbed his ankle and hoisted him up. He put Sami Zayn over his shoulder and threw him in the bin, just in time for the bin lorry to arrive.
» Lucha House Party vs Local Competitors who were never mentioned by name was possibly the most pointless squash RAW have had for a while. What were they trying to build or establish? It was over quickly though.
» Ricochet vs Robert Roode was for Ricochet’s place in the Money in the Bank match. Roode thinks he deserves Ricochet’s place in the match because he beat Ricochet a couple of weeks ago. He didn’t beat him tonight though. Ricochet got the win with a 630 and retains his place in the Money in the Bank match.
» Rey Mysterio and his son Dominik were shown talking on the way to Mysterio’s dressing room. Dominik left him at the door and walked away and Samoa Joe was shown following him down the corridor. After a break, Joe had Dominik cornered and was yelling at him. He told Dominik to tell his father he’s looking forward to facing him for the title at Money in the Bank.
» Lacey Evans invited Natalya, Naomi, and Dana Brooke to ringside for her match, and requested formal ringside attire. The invitations were apparently peach cobbler scented.
Lacey Evans vs Allie Catrina was another squash. All four Money in the Bank match competitors came to watch, so Bliss obviously got an invite too. After she’d punched out Allie Catrina, she thanked them for coming and told them off for not sending an RSVP. She’s brought them out to see what a legitimate lady is capable of. It was a warning for them in case one of them wins the briefcase after she’s taken the title from Becky Lynch.
Becky Lynch arrived to shut her up and they picked up where they left off last week. Evans was forced to roll out of the ring and retreat to avoid a Dis-Arm-Her.
» The Viking Raiders vs Zack Ryder & Curt Hawkins was a non-title match. Hawkins and Ryder told Michael Cole earlier in the day that they were going to use teamwork to neutralise The Viking Raiders, and it worked for them for a little while. Perpetual motion was their best offence, and they used it well, but every time they got caught they got flattened. Curt Hawkins had already been laid out at ringside by the time Zack Ryder took The Viking Experience and got pinned.
» Bray Wyatt’s Firefly Fun House was back for another episode. Mercy the Buzzard was eating something in a box and wouldn’t tell Bray or Abby the Witch what he was eating. It turned out to be Rambling Rabbit, that Wyatt was talking to last week. Wyatt forgave him – because you can always be forgiven, just like he was – and they had a picnic with some unimpressed looking children.
» The Revival vs Gallows & Anderson was hijacked by The Usos before it even got started. They had filled The Revival’s wrestling trunks with their own version of Icy Hot – Ucey Hot. Jimmy and Jey told us it was sweat activated. We got to see the results of the prank and Dash and Dawson scooted around the ring like dogs with impacted anal glands and rolled about in pain. The Usos offered them water, but only told them they were supposed to drink it after they’d poured it down their trunks. Water makes it worse. The Revival ran off screaming. I know the payoff match, or matches, will be incredible, but this is a very odd way to build a feud between two of the most talented tag teams in the world.
» No Way Jose vs Lars Sullivan wasn’t a match. But it was nice to see No Way Jose, however briefly. Sullivan started his trail of destruction on the conga line, paused to launch Jose over the barricade when he tried to stop him, then took out the conga line members who hadn’t been quick enough to run. No Way Jose had another attempt to fight him off but that ended in a Lars Sullivan sit out powerbomb.
» Naomi has joined the Boys & Girls Clubs of America Hall of Fame.
» Vince McMahon was interrupted on the phone by Lars Sullivan. He was talking about his Wildcard Rule being three individuals only or he’d suspend someone. When Sullivan turned up, he changed it to four and Sullivan left again.
This was the most chaotic and confused RAW in a long time. Pointless squash matches, a conveniently implemented Wildcard Rule that changed mid-show, locker-room pranks, Sami Zayn in a dumpster. It’s enough to make Firefly Fun House look logical, almost. Some of it was fun, but it feels like we’re waiting for some kind of massive direction change. Stay tuned, I guess.