Welcome to the most must-see Vulture Hound weekly review in history; welcome to… The SmackDown Review

Following on from all the drama at TLC SmackDown’s newly crowned tag team champions, Bray Wyatt and Randy Orton, looked to make their first title defence as they took on the former champs, Heath Slater and Rhyno, invoking their rematch clause. With nothing new developing after the events of Tables, Ladders and Chairs SmackDown seem to be taking a breather this week. I’d like to end the review here but my obligation requires me to at least tell you the full picture. Here we bloody go!

AJ Styles opened the show, coming down to the ring in his civilian clothing. Weird. After retaining his title on Sunday the champ was left unable to compete on the night as was visible from the massive walking boot he had on his left foot. The Phenomenal One chose to acknowledge the little wardrobe malfunction which left part of his ass exposed during his match with Dean Ambrose. Good to know the Champ doesn’t always take himself too seriously. It was then that James Ellsworth came to the ring and claimed Styles was just making excuses just to avoid facing him for the title – remember, for some reason Shane O’Mac gave the guy a full contract and title shot. Styles, correctly so, responded by calling Ellsworth delusional, and furthered that it’s Dean Ambrose who is responsible for the Chinless One’s success, but due to his deceit at TLC he’s now made an enemy. At that moment Ambrose came to the ring and hit Ellsworth with the Dirty Deeds and then left straight away. How is Ellsworth still the spark that is lighting this feud between Ambrose and Styles? Your guess is as good as mine.

The first match of the night confirmed my suspicions: The new Wyatt Family entrance music is fantastic. The whining intro to Randy Orton’s old theme plays before being breaking down into the usual Wyatt Family ‘Catching Flies’. With this music introduced it seems as though Orton is set for a prolonged stay with Wyatt as they commence their run as SmackDown Tag Team Champions. The pair easily defeated Heath Slater and Rhyno with a Sister Abigail into an RKO on Slater. Just like when I first met your Mum, I didn’t think the combination would work, yet it is going rather well at the moment. Time will tell just how far this new formation of the Wyatt Family will go up the SmackDown ladder of success.

Imagine if they had more members and more gold? Faction warfare! // wwe.com
Imagine if they had more members and more gold? Faction warfare! // wwe.com

Carmella continues to blame Natalya for the mystery attack on Nikki Bella back at Survivor Series and claimed that Natalya is just a loser that is jealous of Nikki. I’d be jealous too if I didn’t have my own spin off series! Natalya angrily chased Carmella out backstage where she ran into Nikki and tried to say Carmella was lying about everything. Nikki simply gave her one of those disapproving looks your parents give you after you’ve had one too many chardonnays and left without saying a single word. If at first you thought it was bad she gets paid and doesn’t compete, well, she now turns out without having to open her mouth. Season 2 of Total Bellas will be arriving on your screens in 2017!

In less interesting news:

– The Hype Bros defeated The Ascension with the Hype Ryder. Mojo Rawley is no closer to becoming a normal human being.

– Baron Corbin once again defeated Kalisto in a rematch from TLC because, you know, the big guys always beat the little guys.

– Chadley Gable beat Tyler Breeze with a modified Chaos Theory German suplex. A move which makes Gable sound more like a mad scientist than a former Olympic athlete. “Wrestling is illogical” – Albert Einstein

Those tight leather pants actually have the word "fantabulous" on them... and I thought they were the Fashion Police? // wwe.com
Those tight leather pants actually have the word “fantabulous” on them… and I thought they were the Fashion Police? // wwe.com

Being the gloating type, Alexa Bliss, made her way to the ring to celebrate becoming the new SmackDown Women’s Champion. Her celebrations were cut short as Becky Lynch interrupted her to demand a rematch right. Alexa toyed with the possibility but instead, did what all great heel champions do, and left with her title.

In an earlier segment on the we were treated to the latest instalment of MizTV. Miz and his wife Maryse were joined by none other than the “hot-headed lunatic”, Dean Ambrose, as JBL would often say. Miz continued to give Ambrose compliments, albeit backhanded, and presented Ambrose with the first ever ‘Miz Participation Award’ as a gesture of goodwill and consolidation for once again losing to AJ Styles. Clearly upset, Ambrose threatened to shove it down the Miz’s throat to which Daniel Bryan took the opportunity to make the nights main event an Intercontinental Championship Match between Ambrose and Miz. You’d think Mr Bryan doesn’t like the Miz that much with all these title defences he keeps putting him in.
Despite losing title match after title match, Ambrose was presented with the chance to win his second ever Intercontinental Championship. As expected, Maryse interfered which the referee didn’t see, so Ellsworth came to ringside to complain, which then inadvertently caused the ref to miss an Ambrose pin on the Miz. Ambrose was of course furious with Ellsworth and this allowed The Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale and successfully retain his IC Title.

The Miz v Daniel Bryan for the Intercontinental Championship at WrestleMania 33. Heard it here first // wwe.com
The Miz v Daniel Bryan for the Intercontinental Championship at WrestleMania 33. Heard it here first // wwe.com

Join me next week where we will be on day 217 of Bradley Tiernan’s Never Ending VultureHound Review Tour.