The Linus Report: Lucha Underground, 01/07/2015

Hey, it’s Lucha Underground! The show with only a tiny bit of magic this week, honest!

The show started with the usual “Previously on…”, this week featuring Chavo Guerrero Jr & Dario Cueto, Delavar Daivari & Texano (Jr), Drago & Hernandez, and Mil Muertes.

In Dario Cueto’s office, Chavo Guerrero Jr said it was time for Cueto to fulfill his final request – a title match. Cueto said he could have it right away, and that it would be no DQ. Cueto asked if there was anything else Chavo needed and he asked for something to be done about Konnan’s cane. Cueto said that if Konnan interfered in the match, Chavo would automatically win the title.

The announcers welcomed us to the show, and Matt Striker thanked this week’s band, Mexican Dubwiser. Vampiro hyped a match between Drago and Hernandez, and then they threw to the ring for the opening match.

Hey, it’s Melissa Santos! She introduced Delavar Daivari, who was already in the ring (and accompanied by Big Ryck), and his opponent, Texano!

They had a decent-enough match, with Big Ryck a threat rather than a factor. The finish came when Big Ryck grabbed Texano’s bullrope, Texano superkicked him off the apron, and then hit a sit-out powerbomb on Daivari for the win. Daivari really doesn’t fit in Lucha Underground, so if that’s the end of this feud I won’t be too unhappy.

Backstage, Prince Puma was lifting weights while Konnan gave him advice about the title match later tonight. The lights flickered and suddenly Catrina was there. She told Puma that if he won against Chavo he’d have to face Mil Muertes, who would destroy anyone who stood in his way. Muertes then emerged from the darkness and they both vanished. Konnan told Puma it was all mind games.

After a break, Konnan was talking to a mystery man backstage. He told him that it was time Mexico got its revenge on Chavo and that no-one was more Mexico than the mystery fella…

Hey, it’s Melissa! She introduced Hernandez, and then Drago, for their grudge match started two weeks ago when Drago beat Hernandez to become the number one contender, a position he lost last week when Hernandez beat him up before a match with Mil Muertes. Totes soap opera.

So they had a decent big man, little man match, which Drago won by DQ when Hernandez grabbed a fan out of the front row, stole his belt, and then started whipping and choking Drago with it. After the match, Hernandez got on the mic’ and told the fans that they didn’t know that dragons weren’t real. He challenged anyone in the audience to come in and get their ass beat.

Backstage, Chavo Guerrero Jr was preparing for his title match with Prince Puma when the lights flickered and Catrina appeared. She told him that if he won against Prince Puma his celebration would be short-lived because Mil Muertes would destroy him. Muertes appeared and Chavo told both them he’d see them at Ultima Lucha.

Hey, it’s Melissa again! She introduced Marty “The Moth” Martinez, already in the ring and getting waaaaay too close to her for her comfort, and then his opponent, Alberto el Patrón!

The announcers explained that Martinez had annoyed Dario Cueto and so Cueto had put him in against some of the toughest guys in Lucha Underground – first Prince Puma, then as part of a four-way with Cage, The Mack, and Aero Star, and now against Alberto.

Yeah, this didn’t take long, which is odd because Martinez had been getting some good heat the last few weeks, even against Puma. Alberto locked on a cross armbreaker and Martinez tapped in under a minute.

After the match, Alberto told Johnny Mundo that he knew he could hear him and wanted to say “thank you”. He said Mundo had woken up the side of him that was vicious and sadistic and that side is coming after him. He said messing with Alberto was not only the biggest mistake of Mundo’s life, but the last…

Hey, it’s our main event! It’s Prince Puma versus Chavo Guerrero Jr, for the Lucha Underground Championship! Chavo came out with The Crew, and Puma had Konnan with him – forbidden, Santos announced, to interfere on pain of a title change. The crowd did not like that.

They traded moves early doors and then Chavo seemed to pull his hamstring. The Crew took over on offense, with Konnan threatening to get involved but staying out of the action to peserve Puma’s title. The Crew continued their attack and hit a big DDT and held Puma down while Chavo climbed to the top turnbuckle.

Konnan called for help and Texano ran out, beat up The Crew and hit a sit-out powerbomb on Chavo. Puma then hit his 630 Splash for the win, to retain his title. After the match, Texano told Chavo that Mexico wasn’t coming for him, Mexico was HERE.

Backstage, Chavo Guerrero Jr sat nursing his injured hamstring. Blue Demon Jr walked in and mocked him. Chavo said that Mexico had gotten Texano to do their dirty work because Blue Demon Jr wasn’t up to it and that made Blue Demon Jr angry. He grabbed Chavo and shouted, “¡YO SOY MEXICO! ¡YO SOY!” And that’s your show and heel turn, I guess.

This was a Good Show. Last week’s was a little weak but things bounced right back this week, and everything’s on track for the two-hour Ultima Lucha finale on August 5th. All the pieces are falling into place and I wonder how much is going to be left dangling for season two…

(Lucha Underground airs in the US on the El Rey Network on Wednesdays at 9pm ET, and en Español on Unimas on Saturdays at 4pm ET. It does not currently air in the UK but you can probably find it somewhere out there in the ether…)

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