VH Monopoly

4 Musical Versions of Monopoly Hasbro Should Consider

Big news. Adam Lambert’s Queen is getting its own version of Monopoly!

The new version of the game is set to have living rooms all over the world rocking with the sweet success of licensed band merchandising (and capitalism). We can’t wait.

But what can we expect….?

Answer:

“Produced with the full collaboration of the band, the MONOPOLY: Queen Edition game features six collectible Queen tokens inspired by their iconic career and bespoke ‘houses’ and ‘hotels’ designed by the band’s Brian May. The game board features gig venues from throughout Queen’s illustrious history – from the band’s formation in 1970, right up to the 1986 Wembley and Knebworth shows – Freddie Mercury’s (who?) last appearances, thanks to Roger Taylor’s encyclopaedic memory of their live experiences.”

However, there’s no mention of how the band’s iconic frontman, Adam Lambert, will be represented in the game.

Queen_Monopoly

So, after 82 years of bringing equal amounts of fun and monotony to households all over the world, it appears the makers of Monopoly have finally reached their creative peak… or have they?

We assume Hasbro must be sitting around, twiddling their moustaches, wondering how on earth they’ll ever top this edition of the game, so we’ve dreamt up some fresh, new, exciting ideas to help!

 

Burzum Monopoly

Varg Vikernes – former Mayhem bassist and current Viking revival plonkton. Norwegian Black Metal’s bogeyman is never short of a prank or two. From murdering band mates to burning down churches; his history of hijinx is prime Monopoly material. Plus, some mass market appeal may give those people walking around in Burzum t-shirts some context.

burzum monopoly

New Chance and Community Chest Cards:

“You are assessed for Church repairs:  500kr per Church, 1000kr per Cathedral”.

“Go to jail, move directly to jail, become an anti-Semitic holocaust denier”.

 

Refused Monopoly

Refused are fucking dead. Or not. Whether you’re on board with the resurrection of one of Hardcore’s most iconic bands, you can’t deny it’s pretty sweet to have Lyxzen and Co. performing live again. So forget poorly judged come back albums and remember why we loved them to begin with – our collective hatred of capitalism, right? And what better way to satirize the money machine than with Refused Monopoly. #FreeParking.

refused monopoly
The evil face of Capitalism

New Chance and Community Chest Cards:

“Bank error in your favour. Collect £200. Refuse it. Down with capitalism”.

“17 years after releasing The Shape Of Punk To Come…, release Freedom – go back three years and tell yourselves not to bother”.

 

Misfits™ Monopoly

If Misfits™ Monopoly doesn’t already exist then Jerry Only has been slacking. We’ve seen Misfits™ Branded Uggs, Misfits™ Branded Christmas Decorations, and even a Misfits™ Branded Nappy Changing Bag – so why no Misfits™ Branded Monopoly!? I’m adding it to the list of other missing merchandise opportunities, along with; Misfits™ Branded Toaster (one that burns the Crimson Skull logo onto the bread), Misfits™ Branded Pregnancy Test, and Jerry Only’s very own line of protein shakes and muscle-building supplements.

Misfits Merch
Buy, Buy, Buy, My Darling…

New Chance and Community Chest Cards:

“From sale of Misfits™ Branded Colostomy Bag you get $50”.

“Go back to Michale Graves. Please”.

 

Yeezy Monopoly

Imagine the once colourful yet uniformed Monopoly board replaced with various shades of beige – you’re imagining Yeezy Season 1 Monopoly.

Imagine every property being ridiculously expensive and unobtainable to the common man – you’re imagining Yeezy Season 1 Monopoly.

Imagine every move you make during a game somehow manages to alienate each and every single one of the people who once loved and admired you – you’re imagining Yeezy Season 1 Monopoly.

yee-boot-monopoly
Original inspiration.

 

New Chance and Community Chest Cards:

“Beyoncé wins second prize in a music video contest. Make a tit of yourself. Make pay… I guess”.

“It’s 2021- Advance to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave”.

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Queen MONOPOLY edition is available from May 5th. Pre-order now from Winning Moves and QueenOnline.

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